Early idleeric ... Dedicated to George Harrison.

idleeric

12/02/2001

1. My first ASSC post (2-6-96) ... & some feedback from old Old timer ...

 

>>...been lurking around here for a while...been hyping the Motor City:

>>Q: Do any of those FFs touch down at Metro Airport? Some of the dancers

>>here think they're working in a Third World country...like

>>cargo-cultists, they've erected a huge rusted autoparts phallus nr the

>>Uniroyal tire on I-94...waitin' for TM to miraculously appear...

>>

>

>Probably not in '96, unless something surprising is on the horizon.

>However, since the "conference sponsor" to whom I regularly refer is looking

>for new locations <snip>, I have had

>some success in "steering them" to "appropriate" locations. (Like Houston

>this coming June -- thought I'd get Tampa, too, but they decided it was time

>for the west coast, so I'll have to "settle" for LA)

>

>'97 is a possibility, certainly. If I recall, one of the other ASS-C

>regulars hails from Detroit also (got it noted on my system at home but not

>here at the office -- I don't think it's CQue -- he's Minneapolis, I think,

>but I'm not sure off-hand just who it is.) [ed – close ]

>

>And then, of course, if I read that it's just too, too good to pass up, and

>local ASS-C'ers have got the kind of rapport with the Dancers that the

>Houston folks do, well, I *might* make a special trip. GRIN. (Damn, those

>ARE expensive, though. Houston must have set me back about $1,500 all in.

>Worth every penny, though.)

>

>btw, your note is unsigned. Shall I simply call you Idle Eric?

>

>Catch ya later.

>

>Travelin' Man

>

>

"idleeric" is even better...the 'net is an essentially Joycean realm. …started on the club scene out of sheer boredom about 6 yrs. ago...first crossed the river (Sarnia, London, and, of course, Jason's in Windsor); at that time, Ontario was clearly superior to what I thought metrodetroit had to offer... in the past few years, a combination of a general slackoff there, an explosion of activity here, and the hassle of going through customs, bridge/tunnel backups etc. has happily steered me into several very satisfying clubs. Because I enjoy what I've got (and don't have an unlimited ATM balance), I don't venture into more than a small fraction of the many clubs here. I frequent the Landing Strip regularly...absolutely first rate in every facet; Trumpp's on occasion...good, but somewhat overhyped... great if you like a metallic, pseudo NYC, suit and tie environment...and Playhouse for a rare down and dirty, no-holds-barred treat. From what I've read herein ….Detroit should be on any serious ASSCer's short list. ...keep posting

 

2. Crackdown! (3-96) ....

 

A.

 

Hi there,

 

sorry it's taken me so long to reply. There is no more contact at the Landing Strip. strange- how quickly it all could change. the club owner seems confident that lap dancing is gone for good (or atleast a long while).

 

I will probably move - Memphis, Atlanta, Tampa, Dallas. Have you any suggestions?

 

Jesse appreciated the book - did she have a chance to thank you yet?

 

 My advice (professional) (if personal, I'd say STAY): check out Houston, if you want to have it both ways...big $ and uninhibited environment. Lot of action this yr. in Atlanta w/ Olympics. I will be headed to Italy btwn. 4-4 & 4-16, but of course will try to stop by beforehand...

 

 Trumpp's update (info to 3-23) - WCtyPros may be out of luck, because of police misconduct: after arrest, dancers taken downtown for booking, where according to DetNews & my sources at club, they "modelled" for booking cops,; their atty has possession of resulting photos... I wonder if they were inspired by Sharon Stone?

 

 I think my init. advice may have been excessively cautious/ paranoid... use common sense when dealing with unfamiliar patrons & play by club rules. Take care.

 

B.

 

I rolled in at 2:00 a.m. after a hell packed trip east (will e-mail details tomorrow, inc. minireview of Sundowner's in Niagara Falls) . Just finished catching up on over a week's worth of unread ASSC material. No win flame war w/ rjordon; depressing Detroit club update fm CMG, etc. life's a bitch. Wish I had stayed put in Indy.

 

From ???@??? Wed Mar 27 17:59:45 1996

To: AkaCMG@aol.com {Ed: Long Dead link}

From: stdumbo@mich.com (idleeric)

Subject: Re: Indy ASSC Meeting Report, 3/23

Cc:

Bcc:

X-Attachments:

>The Indianapolis Meeting of Midwestern ASSCers took place Saturday,

beginning

>as planned at Brad's Gold Club.

>

>IN ATTENDANCE:

>IDLEERIC & CMG from Michigan

>BILL FROM MUNCIE (WLEller)

>OLDFOOL72 from Peoria

>SPECIAL AGENT DALE COOPER from Cincinnati

>

>CONSPICUOUS IN THEIR ABSENCE:

>ODIN, cuz it was all his idea (Way to go, oh, immortal one)

>LEATHERKAT, cuz....well, cuz she's, like, a girl

>

>I made it to Brad's, on the west side, right after they opened at 3. It was

>pretty quiet, with one dancer on stage and two guys at a table. It was Bill

>from Muncie and OLDFOOL72, resplendent in his Big Al's T-shirt and cap. I

>introduced myself as Travelin' Man, which they seemed to accept. I quickly

>dropped the gag, and we all got to chatting. A few minutes later, an

>official-sounding guy appeared, announcing that the car with Michigan plates

>had its lights on. As I began for the door, he introduced himself as

>idleeric, just shaking me out. Then another customer who had been alone at

>the stage came over. None other than Special Agent Dale Cooper, making us

>five.  etc.

 

. And so, at 2:30 AM, after 11-1/2 hours ,,,,

 

C.

 

>> Since you have first hand Toronto experience, I am very interested in

>>your views vis-a-vis Detroit:

>> It appears to me that right now Detroit is where Toronto was right after

>>the legal shit hit the fan; that doesn't necessarily mean the paths will be

>>parallel (after all, Detroit is paradoxically a much more corrupt and

>>puritanical place), but I sense a tightening of the screws that will be very

>>difficult to pry loose in both cities.

>

>The best clubs in Toronto (ie. the ones that provided the hottest lap

>action) are the ones that are watched more closely right now and as a result

>club management is policing the lap/touching situation quite tightly. Of

>course, it depends on the girl, but it's a hit and miss situation. It seems

>that those who are used to a certain income level will provide unoffical lap

>dances but they are constantly looking over their shoulders to see if anyone

>is coming/looking. There are still good laps available in small clubs on

>the fringe of the city, but the quality and quantity of girls severely

>lacks. Make no mistake, lap dancing in Ontario will never come back to

>where it once was and therefore, I doubt if Windsor will push Detroit back

>into it. My guess is that when lap dancing first started in Toronto it

>brought out a different dancer than who worked the clubs before and now that

>lap dancing is officially gone, over time the lap dancers will thin out and

>the more docile dancers will become a more dominant population in the clubs,

>so that it will be more and more difficult to get an unoffical lap dance.

>

Sage observations... the "thinning out" is already happening - a dancer at the Landing Strip (which even before the Trumpp's bust was into heavyhanded self-policing) requested my advice concerning a move to Tampa, Atlanta, Dallas etc. I believe though that Windsor (which enforces pretty strict "no touch" rules) is already killing off a lot of Detroit business: another Detroit ASSCer posted an account of a Channel 50 news report that business at the Playhouse, the consensus #1 lap club, is already down by nearly 50%, while "Studio 4" (IMHO a worthless dive on the Ontario side of the Ambassador Bridge) reports a 30% increase in $US & is hiring more wetback dancers (this time from the US rather than Latin America) Thus I think it's even money that a gradual return to hot laps will happen. The legal foundation for the initial crackdown is shakier here, and the fecklessness and backbiting among clubowners had more influence on what has happened to date.

 

3. Two Future Old timers Meet (5-96):

 

>I think we are all frustrated comedy writers--genuinely funny stuff tends to

>happen more by luck than intent. The current situation a la Michigan reminds me

>of going home to Colorado, or even going to West Virginnie if'n you don't know

>what's going on there. So, I sympathize--A LOT. I never have been to a club

>where the largest proportion of the dancers are genuinely working "hard" for

>their money. I guess I just find one or two at each :-). To have been in that

>environment and lose it to fools would be a pisser beyond belief. Okay, I can

>see why no more reviews. I hereby request that you fool around a lot, so that

>there would be more idleeric to read.

>

>DrD

 

i jumped into ASSC in feb '96; the clubs get hit hard the 1st wk in march, nahhh, this will pass (cf. peakay)... it doesn't (cf. cmg)... bad karma, & I didn't even get a shot at a present tense review (though we passed some interesting notes via e-mail re: gigi - playhouse; J*** (aka catherine) the CSG cheerleader @ ls etc., etc you name it, they did it w/ stunning attitude) BTW, they've mostly headed south to atlanta/houston.... those crackers better not start taunting us, gingrich-style we're in an ugly mood

 

4. Guess who ..... (5-96)

 

>Hey Motown Rube,

>

>Is Stdumbo pronounced Saint Dumbo? hmmm. The neighborhood I live in is named

>Dumbo (Down Under Manhattan Bridge Overpass).

 

>I showed up fashionably late for my rendezvous with Idleeric figuring he

>would have got caught in traffic coming down to Brooklyn from Connecticut. I

>was wearing my best Catholic attire (a mother and child tee shirt) in honor

>of his Holey Mission and anticipated entering "Wild West", queueing up to the

>bar and nursing a luke warm Budweiser while nervously watching the clock half

>expecting to be stood up. So I was pleasantly surprised to see the big guy at

>the bar smile broadly while pointing at the holy duo...... Let the

>festivities begin!

>

>Idleeric, ever the lawyer, was toting a big manila folder (which by the way

>he eventually forgot..... would Johnie Cochrane do that? I think NOT!) with

>several issues of the requisite East Coast strip guide, "Sophie's

>Mentertainment", as well as printouts of my Brooklyn post and directions to

>my favorite erotic ghetto. After the introductions, he explained the S.E.G.

>he was sporting as a result of a fine late afternoon outing at the Zebra Club

>in Norwalk, Conn. I'm sure he'll tell you all about it.

>

 

5. Infatuation ..... (6-96):

 

A.

 

to DrD -->

 

to give you some idea of how good detroit was, i started clubbing in sarnia, hung there for years, & was pulled away by the action at the Landing Strip, a "gentlemen's club" w/ valets, tuxed bouncers etc., then i was pulled away from there (even though LS has Jesee, the Lapdance Queen, & Catherine the Great (who just e-mailed last nite that she's cummin' back after her olympic stint at the Gold Club in Atlanta) by the playhouse, which also has chrome bar, valets etc. ...you'd never guess what went on there because detroit is

computer illiterate, cmg & peakay aren't talking (except in euphemisms) but i'm losing hope that by keeping my mouth shut, the glory days will return..... when i have truly Abandoned All Hope, you'll be reading some dynamite posts....

 

>atlanta got to hot and crowded for me. so i'm back for the

>remainder of the summer - perhaps until late january. i'll be working at

>the strip. i hope you are able to come visit. as soon as my injury

>heals (i accidentily charred my breast with a curling iron)- i'll be

>there everyday. hope all is well with you.

 

welcome back!

 

i hope for a very speedy recovery ... you are not a complainer, so i know the injury is not minor...

 

this might cheer you up: i was at the sundowner in niagara falls last month at the beginning of my chronicled ecoast roadtrip, and while entering the notorious vip room, ran into a coffee table full steam...nailed my shin flush, & 6 weeks later still have a proud scar ... like weimar republic students, we have our duelling scars ... beats tatoos or body piercing. please announce your opening day ... i'd like to be there to throw out the first ball....

 

B.

 

>Eye think you really outdid yourselves this time, Idle, blubbering genius of

>Ft. Solipsism.

>

>Melville goes right to the top of my must read list now.......

>

>As for the name, "Done John" has a nice ring to it..... maybe "Done, John" if

>they allow punctuation. Why not just John Done? Done Johnson? I like "Eyehab"

>or maybe "Reyehab". "48" is definitely out, but "iii" is still a possibility.

>

>"Fountain of Laps" sounds intriguing. I gotta make it to Hurley. How's the

>Miniature Golf up there?

>

>September?

>

>Eyehab (yeah, I like that) on.....

 

right now i've got a one track mind: Catherine The Great!

 

after a 6 mo. layoff/canadian exile, i grudgingly pulled into scenic downtown Romulus MI about 1:00 p.m. after a shitty a.m. at the Big House in Jackson (State Prison) did a quickchange in Ann Arbor into my summer lapping outfit - a black tee shit you'd be proud of ("Industrial Milwaukee – Working Milwaukee" w/ '30s Socialist Realism logo) & loose green baggie shorts...had gotten e-mail message a few weeks ago frm. Catherine that she was fleeing from the Gold Club in Atlanta back to MI....she had dropped a curling iron on one of her tits; left a nasty burn scar (i neglected to advise filing for worker's comp)...she wanted advice where to work: i reminded her the horrid Wayne Co. scene she had fled hadn't changed, but suggested the Playhouse on Middlebelt rather than the nowlame Landing Strip we once had called home.

 

 against my advice, she writes she's back at LS...

 

i replied (after initially promising i'd race thru hell & back if she ever came back to MI) that i couldn't be there opening day to throw out the first pitch...blamed poison ivy from the Porcupine Mts. in the W Upper Penin ("UP") (nr Hurley WI)

 

so, my attitude was seriously lacking ("fuck that shitty club" "fuck that lame brainless bouncer" "she might be a sweet girl, but who needs an accident prone ivy leaguer w/ a fried tit" etc.)

 

i give my precious silver Saturn keys to the slacker valet (thinking "kiss that baby goodbye if O'Hair's goons raid the club")...up the stairs; (the main club room is on the 2nd floor of one of those crumbling 19thC brick storefronts that are a feature of every dead upstate NY/upper midwest county seat), through the door...standing there where the fathead bouncer once perched is the new bouncer...one of my fav ex-dancers: she's got a serious butch face on, but she looks great....hmmmm, maybe this will be interesting,

after all:  the fucking room is nearly empty, so i plop down at my old seat at the bar, a short reach from one of the two stage poles...a good HMS for stage tipping...immediately, a browneyed blonde with a flawless (my stare will knock you dead) visage sits down ("hey" the reptile brain registers "she used to give nasty laps") next stool & draped both legs across my crotch ("hey" the reptile brain flashes "this ain't canada, where you often need a semiphore to get anyone's attention")....gradually the Old Faith is Suspending all the Disses....  "how about me taking you upstairs for..." rubbing those pretty heels into my agnostic cock....

 

"I just pulled in from Jackson...don't you remember..."

 

" you just got released?"

 

"don't you remember? i'm the guy who defends rapists & murderers, Ha Ha"

 

"Kewl"

 

meanwhile, one reptile eye scans the room for Catherine: i spy the dropdead gorgeous ex-tyro brunette from w MI who i flatter by reminding her i told her she was the prettiest girl in the club the week she started (3 yrs ago) & then tell her (truthfully) she still is...(she's not Catherine or Jessie in the brains or dancing dept., but she may have the most beautiful face in NAmerica) (sidenote: goofyboy, in the post that launched one of the lame "don't ask, don't tell" threads, rated LS his #1 club in middleamerica...if you recall, i agreed w/ him... i don't believe it's possible any club in houston or sf has prettier women...) {Ed: & this is *before* I realized Karen McDougal aka "Brandi" worked there}

 

the Heelrubber asserts herself... "tell me about your day...." so, rather than have her vacuum my wallet clean, i do, giving her a 15 minute synopsis of Jailhouse Law....

 

"you're sure you don't want me to take you upstairs for a dance" (she lifts her infintesimal lacy white seethru G for a cunt flash)

 

i feel a terminal case of cognitive dissinence descending so i reply:

"look, i only stopped by to see Catherine....& it looks like she's not here"

 

"she's upstairs"

 

"let's go"

 

as we reach the crest of the starcase...there she is straight ahead, straddling a spaced out john, grinding away on his crotch...."BOB!!!!"

...."idleeric, i presume"

 

BANG....BUZZ...i look into those iceblue slanted celtic eyes, & i'm toast......i recover my cool quickly, Assume the Position, & permit

Heelrubber the honor of polishing the crown jewels....meanwhile, chattering away w/ Catherine while she services Mr. John (just like a couple of moonstruck high school sophomores...other than the unusual setting)

 

....for the next 3 1/2 hours, i hang out at the HMS...occasionally, Catherine stops by, but i need not remind her & myself that This Is

Business, so she steadily rakes in the Jacksons (nonstop except for stage calls) while i refuse every offer: "I'm waiting for Catherine" ...."Oh, you're a sweet boy, - we understand" (Catherine skitters about: "BOB, I can't wait...let me finish w/ that guy first...god, it's so good to see you..." (squeezing my nipples) I contentedly watch her stage dance: she starts w a Hathaway men's shirt & her trademark green & blue pleated plaid cheerleader skirt which she deftly & coyly peels off to reveal two perky cream colored tits w pale rose of sharon nipples...she's medium height, w/ a slight but solid frame, a cute belly, and an infectious lisp w the slightest trace of Marilyn Monroe...she wears a tiny white diaphanous cunt patch, secured to a white string around her hips by a string which traverses the

eyelet of her anus, neatly dividing the light brown asshole aureole i've dreamed of jamming... she bumps & grinds away to her heart's content...i get her close enough to add a george to her pile of greenbacks, gartered to her left thigh... "careful, catherine, you might stress fracture your left leg w/ all that weight" ...she laughs, gets close, and pulls down the patch to her snatch (i whisper "so, you have been in atlanta, i see")......

 

"I'm gonna be greedy now....after you leave the stage, it's upstairs"....

She Smiles....

 

she sits on my lap, & we catch up on news..... much about the stripper damage she sustained in atlanta (she lost money)...i talk of my adventures on the ECoast w a great toff from the big apple...after trading stock tips (she likes Buffet's company; i tout Intel), she Gets to Work....reaches in through shorts and in a split second she's stroking naked St. Peter underground, next with her mouth...then she looks up...."that girl's clean, so i'll cool it for a while...the Cleanies don't like to see the Nasties at work" (she's a Nastie, if you haven't already surmised) we chat for a while about cunts: Catherine: "i found out in atlanta that men like to look at our cunts..how strange... women aren't like that ...Idle: (after telling her about the assc post about gynecologists visiting clubs afterhours because they can't get enough.."Catherine, there's a club in Windsor, Danny's...." Catherine: "Oh yes, I've been there...ha ha... i loved getting whacked across the face w/ Yves' penis" ... the Clean Girl (tatooed & w/ a nipple ring... a Ypsilanti Deja Vu transplant) leaves.... since the subject was cunts, Catherine pulls over the G and rubs my nose a bit & a tongue-to-lips kat preening... we finish the set w/ some old fashioned

stevie wonder, while she finishes her hand job.....

 

Q: Should i end my wayne county boycott?

 

--

 * * * * * * * *

"A woman can be proud and stiff

When on Love intent ...

Butt Love has pitched her mansion

in place of excrement."

 

 - after W. B. Yeats